Where’s My Fairy Godmother?

Parenting is tough sometimes.

I love my kids, more than life itself, but man, I doubt myself so much when it comes to what is best for them. If self doubt was an Olympic sport, I would bring the USA gold in this event every four years. I wish that there was some kind of parenting book tailored for each of us parents, so, when we are in doubt, we could turn to the specific chapter and get instant, fail proof answers.

I woke up this morning in a full blown panic about my children and their schooling. My oldest will be going back to middle school second semester, because she wants to attend high school next year. I am proud of her. She has always had such a good sense of self, and what she wants out of life. I have no doubt she will do great things. The thing that really struck a cord with me is something she said. She said, “Mom, I just don’t feel like I’m learning enough here with you.” Painful to hear, but appreciated in it’s honesty.

Enter my panic attack. My son, who is in 5th grade this year, has always been one or two grades ahead in math. He loves math. Being homeschooled this year, I worry I am not doing enough for him. Which then leads me to worry about, what if he wants to go to middle school next year. What if he’s put in the wrong math class because I have hindered him? Should I just put him back in school now? And my first grade daughter, who is at a third grade reading level, and doing second grade math. Am I failing her? Am I failing them all? Where is the parenting book I need right now, so I can turn to the chapter on gut feelings and schooling your children?

I quit my full time job, for a job with less hours and less pay, to follow my gut to homeschool my children. It is something I believe in so much, but worry about everyday. I wrote a blog about two months ago, Am I really failing at everything, and it seems I am still feeling this way today.

I always want to do what is right for my children, so they can achieve their true potential, and greatness. Am I really hindering them, or just hindering myself for always doubting me……

10 thoughts on “Where’s My Fairy Godmother?

  1. I’m not sure that I can help to remedy your self doubt. I think that it afflicts us all in one way or another. If it wasn’t kids education then it would be there health, or your job etc. Your kids sound pretty well adjusted. My feel is that you have to go with your gut; just do what feels best and hope you are close to right!

    Something that amazes me, though, is the number of people in the US who home school. Are the normal schools so bad?

    Anyway, I am enjoying reading what you write, and I wish you luck with the kids.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. This is awesome. You are a FANTASTIC writer. I thinks its really obvious how much you care about your kids and how you can provide the best life for them, Kudos to you (: Now dont mind me, I am going to read more of your awesome posts!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I think you’re being a little too hard on yourself. All your kids are doing above average in their endeavors and I think you should give yourself a little more credit. Take it from me – you are doing a good job.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. You know, Im no parenting expert, far from it. I have teenage sons, and I tell you, every day is a learning curve. You sound like you are doing a great job, and the fact that you worry if you are doing a good job, cements this fact! Kids have a way of showing us how to parent them, and its a real learn on the job role. The best bit of advice I was ever given, especially with teenagers, is pick your battles, and dont sweat the small stuff! Your doing good x

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Pingback: Fearless Moms, Doubts and a Beautiful Disaster | inventing real life

  6. I love reading about homeschooling things. Although my kids firmly ensconced in the school system here in the UK I love getting ideas about things we can try out during the holidays or on weekends. I’m not sure I would have the patience to do homeschooling full time so well done you. I think its amazing that you’re daughter knows the value of her education and is confident enough to take charge of it. That’s a sign of success in my opinion.

    Liked by 1 person

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